If destiny grants,
delivered; my mind for you:
thousands of music.
I know now why I feel lonely even though I have friends asking me out.
Bear with me for a bit, pals… I can’t be there for you now, and I don’t know how long this search will take.
You’re really sweet.
Feels so good to talk to someone new.
Especially when I see her replies match the ones in my head.
I’m glad I stayed home today.
I thought I was fine already.
I guess I’m not.
I sat down at the dining table, staring at the food. It’s exclusive. Exclusively for me. Not the best that she has done, but still pretty okay. Anything made with her love is okay. I eat and I listen to my aunt and mother talk. I store my tears and feint out some pressure through the pretense of a sinus. I scream inside as I think of all the wrongs I’ve done. She’s talking, smiling at me; I’m replying but I want to hug her. I want to pamper her as she has done to me. I want to stop making her heart slow down. I cried it all out the exact moment they exited our home’s door. I broken down and lost it. I am broken, so broken, and I have broken her too.
I won’t anymore.
Why do humans refuse to listen to what is good? Why do humans not know the very best that is in front of them and not appreciate it?
I always thought I have no one to go home to at the end of the day. It stands to a certain extent: she cannot relate to nor fully understand everything I am doing. But I know she loves me a lot. A lot a lot a lot a lot. And no matter what, at the end of the day, she will still love me.
I don’t know what I will do when the day comes for you to leave.
I love you Mummy.
Let me die alone.
I love a lot of people.
But why do I only express it when I am in emotional strain?
My heart is screaming;
I DON’T WANT
TO LEAVE
SAVE ME
Things I wanna lose:
5 kilograms,
10% off my fat percentage,
11B.
Things I wanna gain:
one-way ticket to tokyo,
$20,000,000,000,
hair,
love.
夢のあと
現実を嗤う…
Where did you go?
Why are you going?
Why aren’t you here?
Why do I miss you?
What is this feeling?
Why aren’t you listening?
Why’re you so cold?
How long must I hold?
When will we meet?
How are you feeling?
Hiatus is an overused term nowadays.
I feel that I’ve lost something important, my zing or mojo or whatever. Maybe I didn’t even have it in the first place.
I want to feel wanted again. I want to feel needed again. I want to be close to somebody and have somebody want to be close to me.
I will shut myself out, for the duration of my service. And when I come back, I’ll see.
I must keep telling myself not to do anything unnecessarily.
Where is the ferry?
I’m growin’ weary…
unnecessarily
in this life of mine.
To be continued on my guitar back in camp.
The sun will fail the birds will faint for us, for you and me ah
Booking in at 1850 and I am so angry ah
